Thursday, March 20, 2014

YOU CALL YOUR LAWYER

You call your lawyer
I'll call my lawyer
we'll decide which lawyer
has the hottest wife
and we'll then decide
where to go from there
and which wife
we take with us
and who goes first

I've been wondering,
with all the crap i write,
it it wouldn't be prudent
for me to have
a safe house ready
just in case.......

okay, I'll admit it.
I'm just using you.
are you feeling used?
screwed?

this nagging question:
is there rehab for poets?


Then, she said:
let me rub it for you.
don't remember much after that,
but I woke up in jail.

so, suppose that says a lot
about what she was rubbing,
but not what or where.
but I do remember when.

and to think
she could have been a friend,
if not for all that rubbing
and time spent in jail.


we need separate beans
from wieners.
it's only fair each
should live their lives
independently of each other.

as a means to an end,
according to rules of engagement.
a starting point
for bean lovers
without hindrance from those
sucking up those wieners
that have no friends

no beginnings or ends
wieners 'til the end
beans and wieners
never meant
they should be friends
but so deliciously
independent
of each others desires. 


well, me again,
but don't get up.
we've been all through this,
and it's time for us
to stand up, be counted,
share our misery
with those less fortunate.

and to realize less
can and should be more.
well, as long as you're up
(I told you not too)
you might as well
get supper started
and prove to me
your love for me is true.


make love today,
and don't worry about tomorrow.
and, come tomorrow,
make love like you did today,
and don't think of tomorrow,

tomorrow becomes yesterday,
lost in today's love,
as romance drifts away,
suddenly frail and afraid,
may become tomorrow's
wasteland 


nuts fried in butter
and not just any butter
a specialized butter
just for frying nuts

butter created by women
bringing out the flavor
women so crave
eating nuts

screaming is an exercise in futility


I'm all about fiction
with just a hint
of truth and justice
and just a smidgen
of justice
soaked in syrup
and strawberry jam

I'm nothing at all
if not mostly honest
with my fingers
sticky with syrup
and strawberry jam
with just a pinch
of woman.
ain't life grand?


well, did u know
a failure to look serious
could lead to rash on your ass,
or pimples on you nibbles?

no, don't you laugh!
this is quite serious!
this isn't easy, you know!
either pimples or rash!













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